It’s Over, ALAN

I’ve thought a lot about how ALAN enters this world.

ALANs first post will be the beginning of ALANs story, a pivotal moment that propels ALAN into existence.  So it has to be right.

Every protagonist needs an antagonist, and I’ve been battling with how abstract I can be.

I am starting ALANs story with an ending.  A sign, stating – ‘IT’S OVER, ALAN’.

There are lots of different things that could be over for ALAN,

There are lots of different scenarios that could have caused the sign to appear, in/on ALANsWorld.

Here are a few :

1 – ALAN has been sent a photograph of the sign by a concerned friend, asking – is this about you?

2 – ALAN has been sent a photograph of the sign by the person who made it, stating – this is for you.

3 – ALAN has seen the sign on a journey he regularly takes (like to work maybe?) – takes a photo of it, knowing it is meant for him.

4 – The sign is completely unrelated to this particular ALAN, however ALAN comes across it, and decides to share it on his blog.


In making the sign I have already taken on another personality – that being – I became the person who made the sign.

I have ink on my fingers, I felt the satisfaction of cutting through the stitching on the sheet, destroying something that was perfectly usable and made for a different purpose.  The blade of the scissors I used will match the cut on the fabric if viewed at microscopic level.

I have thought about where to place the letters, how to draw them out, I have left my DNA on the material, my hair is caught on the tiny fibres, my handprints are all over the sheet, tiny samples of my skin are caught in the glue of the tape I have used to hold the sign in place.  I have the pen I used to write the words in a glass jar on my shelf.  It is traceable, a distinct ink, with its own smell and colour of black.


I got the sheet from my mom.  It smells of her airing cupboard, she doesn’t know why I wanted it.

I found the pen I used to write the letters amongst other pens, in a jam jar, on my shelf.  It doesn’t say that it’s permanent, but the ink is scented with chemicals and it has a chiseled tip, just right for making thick strokes.

I got the tape to hold the sign up from my dad, he left it out in the kitchen, he won’t notice it’s gone.  I was going to buy some from a small shop that sells household items, the sort of shop that has 50+ varieties of screws and bits loose in tiny plastic drawers for sale to the general public, with no record of what has been sold.  I wouldn’t have gone to a shop where there is CCTV. I wouldn’t make eye contact with the teller, I would hope I was forgettable.



Things I would never have done if it wasn’t for ALAN :

  1. Destroyed a bed sheet
  2. Become a psycho for the evening

Hanging the sign : to be continued…











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